Birthday Party Planning Steps
After planning over 20 (!!) birthday parties for my kids, these are the steps I follow when planning them. Hope this list helps you plan your next kid birthday party!
Happy Mother’s Day! Hope that if you’re a mother, or a mother figure, that today is filled with lots of special moments with your kids. And, I hope that you take time to reflect on all that you do behind-the-scenes to keep everything running smoothly for your kids and family, and that you see how special YOU are to the special people in your life, your kids. I see you, and I know that the mothering work is largely unseen, and I commend you for continuing to show up for your family no matter what is happening in your own personal life🩷
Well, as if Maycember isn’t busy enough for families as we wrap up the school year and prep for summer break, I have an added element of my daughter C(8)’s birthday! She was born in May so I am always planning a party and the school classroom celebration for her during this time as well as handling all the other May duties of a parent.... I honestly love planning parties (no surprise, right?!) and celebrating my kids’ birthdays, but adding that to this already hectic month is intense…
I’ve planned birthday parties for my kids at home, at play spaces, in parks, at rec centers, in snow, at the beach – I’ve planned over 20 (!!) parties for them over their lifetime (my kids are 11, 8, 5 so the math adds up!) so I have a lot of experience with what works and what doesn’t…
So, knowing that at some point we all will plan a birthday party for our kid(s), I thought I’d list out the timing of how a Type A Mom (me!) plans birthday parties. I’ve merged my movie making skills (making a movie is extremely similar to planning a party – a lot of behind-the-scenes work for one event that is over quickly!) with my real-world experience and my Type A personality to put together this list of how I like to plan everything leading up to my kids’ birthday parties. I hope that this list gives you ideas, and helps you simplify what needs to get done, for your next kid(s)’s birthday party!
3 MONTHS FROM THE ACTUAL BIRTHDAY
The first step in planning the birthday party is to figure out some key overall points. Starting 3 months from the birthday means you’ll usually be able to figure out the exact venue you want on the date and at the time you want!
Figure out a date and time for the party - look at the school calendar, talk to family who wants to attend about their availability, look at all of your kids’ extracurricular activities, and then think about what time of day you’d like to host the party (take into account nap times, traffic time, give yourself enough time to set up so don’t set the time too early, etc.)
Discuss venues and themes with your birthday kid
Type A Mom Tip: only offer ideas you can pull off/want to do
Book the venue
Type A Mom Tip: if you’re hosting it at home, start to think about what you may need to prep at your house before the party – for example, any yard work or pool work that needs to be done by the party so you can use all the space available
2 MONTHS FROM THE BIRTHDAY PARTY DATE
This is when some bigger picture planning happens (this is so when you send out the invites you’re clear about what the party will be)
Think about the vibe of the party – is it for the entire family, is it for kids only, etc.
Figure out what activities will be at the party
If you want a performer (magician, sports coaches, face painters, etc.) now is the time to research and book them so you can get the ones you want – they book up quickly!
Type A Mom Tip: not all kids will want to do the main activity so consider offering a quiet activity (like simple coloring pages or a craft) in addition to the main one so they can be busy too
Plan what meal you do or do not want to serve everyone
Type A Mom Tip: brunch foods seem to be easier to serve at kid birthday parties since they’re mostly handheld foods (bagels, muffins, applesauce and yogurt pouches, fruit skewers, etc.) which makes them easier to eat and means you won’t have to get cutlery
1 MONTH FROM THE BIRTHDAY PARTY DATE
Time to let people know about the party!
Send out the Paperless Post invitations!
Include all details that you can so people can make a decision about whether or not the party works for their schedule (drop off or stay, what time an activity is happening, what meal or not will be served, etc.)
Click here to see how I like to do my kids’ birthday invites
2 WEEKS FROM THE BIRTHDAY PARTY DATE
This is when the nuts and bolts of the party items will be planned (it gives enough time to see who is actually coming to the party and see what’s available to order)
Order/buy party favors (click here to see how I think about what to offer as a party favor)
Type A Mom Tip: try to offer items kids will likely use - in the past we’ve given things like bubbles, a beach ball, Mad Libs (my 11-year-old son chose these Mad Libs for his party this year), allergy friendly candy, playing cards, Play-Doh, etc.
Order/plan to make food for the party
Make sure to discuss how the food will be delivered or picked up
Type A Mom Tip: if it is a drop off optional party don’t order a lot of adult food because most adults opt to drop off and don’t stay to eat!
Order the cake for the party
Make sure to discuss how the cake will be delivered or picked up
Contact the venue and confirm the party
Also, check with them that you have completed all paperwork needed - like any performer liability insurance information
Get specific information about where and when you can begin bringing things to the party – like balloons, food, decorations
Ask what the rules are for hanging decorations on the wall – some have specific tape you’re allowed to use (usually painters tape is ok), and some don’t allow any hanging items
Order/buy party decorations
Type A Mom Tip: make sure you know the layout of the party room before getting tablecloths so you have enough, and remember to order enough tablecloths for the food and drink tables!
Order/buy any plates, cutlery, etc. you will need for serving food and cake (if the venue doesn’t provide these)
1 WEEK FROM THE BIRTHDAY PARTY DATE
Now is the time to get last minute RSVPs and to confirm with guests so you have a final headcount for food, party favors, seating, etc.
Send out a final RSVP request to guests who have not yet replied
Type A Mom Tip: there are always same-day cancelations or no-shows to kid birthday parties (someone always gets sick!) so keep that in mind and don’t plan for too much extra food
2 DAYS BEFORE THE BIRTHDAY PARTY DATE
Time to remind guests again about the party, and to make sure they know any specific information pertinent to the event!
Send out an invitation reminder for the party with details like:
Parking
Info about if it’s a drop off or stay party
Pickup time
Any special notes about the party (i.e. bring a bathing suit and towel for a swim party, an activity starts at a certain time that the kids won’t want to miss, etc.)
Confirm food and cake
Make sure you’re clear about when you’ll be picking up the items, or what time they’re being delivered and to what location
If food is being delivered, get the contact information for the time it will be delivered so you can be in touch if there is a problem
Confirm all entertainers and make sure to have contact information for them in case something comes up
Assemble party favor bags
Make a “to-remember” list of what needs to be brought to the party (or set up that morning at your house) so you don’t forget anything
I place this list on our kitchen counter a couple days ahead of the party and my husband and I add to it as we remember random things
Remember to add the small but important items like painters tape to tape up decorations, scissors to cut open decoration packages as needed, candles and matches for the cake, etc.
In the following days we will cross items off as they get done and the morning of the party we’ll double check that the list is completely crossed off
NIGHT BEFORE THE BIRTHDAY PARTY
Prep as much as possible the night before the party so you can spend the party day simply setting up and then enjoying the party
Write out a “run of show” for the birthday party
A “run of show” is a timeline of the party so that you can stay on track with timing of activities and how that all leads to when cake should be cut (this is the sign that the party is wrapping up), so that people leave the venue (or your house!) on time
For example, this is what my son A(5)’s run of show was for his 5th birthday party at a rec center (we had to set up the room and then clean it up after so people had to leave at a certain time or we’d be charged a big fee):
10am-10:30am arrival, crafts, food set out for people to graze all party
10:30am-11:15am magic show (crafts still available at tables for kids who don’t want to participate)
11:15am wrap up magic show, crafts, turn up music a little for dance party, kids might eat now
11:30 cake and candles
11:50am hand out party favors
12pm party over, time to clean up venue!
Type A Mom Tip: this schedule isn’t set in stone (except for the performer’s time) so if the party is dragging, bring out the cake and party favors early to keep the energy up
Cut vegetables and fruit for platters, place into portable containers or plastic bags to transport to party venue, and put in fridge to stay fresh
Type A Mom Tip: place all the fridge food items together (on the same shelf or in the same drawer) in the fridge so you don’t forget any of them!
Plan what food and drink items will go on which platters/in which buckets and place those platters by the door (or in the trunk of the car)
Type A Mom Tip: don’t forget to have enough water for adults too!
Place all non-perishable items that need to go to the party (decorations, party favors) by the door (or in the trunk of the car)
Confirm you have the correct information for how to pay all vendors - cash, checks, Venmo, Zelle
Type A Mom Tip: don’t forget you may want to bring cash to tip delivery people, vendors, and performers in addition to their fee!
Lay out outfits for all family members so there’s no drama getting ready the next day!
DAY OF THE PARTY
Check the “to-remember” list to make sure everything is done
HAVE FUN!
Those are the steps I take when planning one of my kid’s birthday parties. Of course each party is unique to each kid and venue and age, but running through those steps helps me ensure I don’t miss anything major. I hope that this list can do the same for you!
❤️, Amanda, your Type A Mom friend
PS- If you’re looking for more birthday party info, check out these related posts I wrote:
How This Year’s Birthday Party Can Help Plan Next Year’s Party!